Friday, 9 July 2010

Walking the line....

There is a fine line between where you need to intervene as a parent and where you need to just let a child learn for themselves. I am really struggling with this at the moment with my eldest. At 13 he needs and deserves to be treated almost as an adult with responsibilities and expectations. Yet I am frequently finding that he needs me more than ever to support him.
He recently made the decision not to visit his fathers house anymore, he still sees his dad but obviously only for a short period of time. This whilst being a very grown up thing to do, taking control of a situation he didn't like and asserting himself enough to make it understood how he feels is a tremendously difficult thing to do even as an adult at times, let alone as a rather insecure 13yr old with trust issues.
Since then he has in part blossomed with confidence due in no small part to new friendship he has made with a really kind and understanding boy in his year. But in the same vain his self confidence is falling again, he doubts himself when he has to rely on himself and consequently he is becoming a little clingy.
Its fine though, I dont mind supporting him at all, I love his company~ the issue is now he is half way to France and because he has no friends with him he is texting me wanting to come home. He wishes he hadn't gone and really I cant blame him. Ive text him back, told him to chill and put the mp3 player on and just shut his eyes. I know he will love where he is going so am hoping if he can get through the coach journey he will pick up when there and be more positive about coming back. Its no fun being alone in a crowd of people you sort of know is it.

Now I am kicking myself for not contacting the teacher and explaining his problems but the school is fully aware and really it should be down to them to ensure all teachers are aware of any individual needs isn't it. All i can do now is be there when he comes home and give him a big cuddle! I hope this doesn't put him back and makes him feel proud of the achievement of getting through an awkward situation

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